You think, therefore I am

My mom says she likes my writing - thanks mom! Could she be lying? Yes.

Either way, the act of her telling me she likes it makes me want to write more. It doesn’t matter if she thinks it’s shit right now because as long as I keep writing, I’ll get better. People tend to lean into things that their good at, and take pride in maintaining and bettering the things th

For me

I’ve always been told I was smart. It started with my family, and branched off into aunts, uncles, teachers, and finally my friends. The first few examples (family, aunts, uncles, teachers) are pretty much required to say those things, but when I get validation from those who are more sparing with their compliments, it makes me actually believe it. I was always good at math and would hear a lot of “how do you do well without studying” and I didn’t really know at the time. The fact is I would hardly ever study the actual material for tests, but I think about things mathematically by default, I was raised to do so.

Positive Illusions

They give you an inch and you take a mile, you end up complacent. They give you an inch and you take a yard or so, then you’re more confident.

In General

In general, people

This blog has two ideas

• Don’t seek validation for things you feel you don’t deserve
  • Don’t lie, be true about your accomplishments and don’t go looking for compliments.
  • You should always be better than you think you are.
• Give validation when someone is working hard, not only when they do a good job
  • Parenting tip here - Raise your kid up to do good and enjoy the process of becoming good

If you want your son to be a world class soccer player you don’t tell him he’s shit the first time he touches a ball. You’d say “Oh you have a natural talent” or “you’re learning so quickly”.

• Of course he’s shit, it’s his first time playing. But if you tell him that he’s going to not want to continue

People always told me

people that are told they have nice hair work to keep their hair nice.

In general, if you’re complimented on your garden, you’re going to keep watering the plants.

There is a line between reinforcing bad behavior and reinforcing future behavior.

There’s no point in telling your kid he’s bad at sports when he’s young. Tell him he’s good so that he’ll fall in love with it and enjoy getting better

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